Tag Archives: dreams

A month till show time … or is it? Every day is show time.

Actually it is less than a month! Eeeek.

I think I may have been in a little denial that my Camino is on the horizon.  Denial that has led to a little procrastination. Perhaps it’s the thought of leaving my family for a month or that I’ve given up living by lists since travelling or maybe it’s the unusual cold frost that’s been blowing over Europe this month.

Leaving my family is definitely something I try not to think too hard about. My husband is capable of getting the kids off to school and ensuring they are fed, read to, loved and washed (at least on Sundays). I’ve left them before … never a full month though, that’s quite a chunk of time hey! Best I let those thoughts go to the keeper!

‘Let it go to the keeper’- seriously that was one of the greatest lessons I learnt from a mentor when I first started work. I was a diligent, motivated and eager to please young teacher. She was a hippie, somewhat disorganised, super creative, senior teacher. Oh but she was doing amazing things. Developing innovative programs that were catching kids at risk, linking in to anything that was on offer in the community, showing kids they mattered,  she was shaking a system that was desperate to be shook.  And she was right; half the crap we worry about or try to have perfect rarely matters. Does it?

I’ve felt myself closing in, going inward, exploring how I’m feeling and behaving in our current life situation. It’s not all roses moving across the world, there are challenges. It’s life. I am finding in this inward space that I’m spending less time on other things and more time sitting with the kids, tucking their hair behind their ears, touching their cheeks and looking into their eyes. I’m even revelling in the smell of their freshly washed hair. I have done less exercise than I should have this month but my base is strong. I am not trying to break records. My hiking legs and my mind – full of grit. If you’ve met my mum you’ll know where I got that from.

Perhaps it’s not denial or procrastination –  just my way of coping and preparing. It is reminding me of just how unimportant most things are in comparison to the people we love. A pilgrimage is about walking with just what you need, a time to pare it all back, to peel away your defences and ultimately I imagine to question your existence.

What will the me that comes home from Santiago de Compostela be like?

The list thing. It wasn’t something I actively gave up doing it just happened. I’m not a disorganised person but I have given up needing to be on top of it all. I do write the odd list. If I am baking something new I need a list. I just wrote a list of the latest people I needed to thank who had donated to my fundraiser. If I need to do practical things like getting a visa organised I’ll do a list but these days I’d be lucky to consult a list a week. Not long lists of things TO-DO – spontaneity and dreams need space to land.

Maybe it’s living without too many commitments or without excess stuff. Over the past years we’ve actively scaled life back. We’ve taken our time easing into living here and creating our new life. We’ve started slow, not too many expectations and there are no swimming lessons, music lessons, excessive play dates or full weekends yet. Every day our play lunch still consists of the same home made muffin recipe with a different fruit flavour. These days I don’t listen to podcasts, TED talks or read books on ‘how’ to do things. My head isn’t aghast with how everyone else is doing things (or telling me how to do things) – I’m  finding my own rhythm. I can find my own way.

That’s not to say I won’t ever again (I’ll need to learn to keep bees one day), it’s just not a high voltage excess noise time. I’ve read a load of Camino memoirs which has lent itself to a more reflective time. I also have four kids remember so my quiet time is preciously mine and sometimes whichever musician’s lyrics are speaking to me, that’s enough for now. Oh gosh I’ve turned into that hippie teacher haven’t I? I will admit I’ve missed a few school meetings and my cards are being delivered very late in my listless life – to.the.keeper that goes!

The weather has been so chilly this winter and it’s been a natural time to hibernate. Knowing I was going to hike the camino has meant I’ve moved my way through the winter, hiking in the freezing sunshine, stomping through the snow and gore-texing it up in the rain. I think setting an April challenge has been a good way to stay warm in winter and keep any SAD at bay.

The spring will be here when I return from my Camino and I’m dreaming of daffodils. I’m dreaming of getting my hands dirty and of growing some food. Tomatoes, basil perhaps? I’d also like to get my kitchen bench looking a little like a fermenting laboratory.  A scoby, some milk kaffir grains and a sough dough starter – I miss them and I’ll be ready. Yes, I have finally started to understand the types of dreams that keep me present yet still allow me to have some plans (I do need plans). The dreams that add to the present but don’t take me away from it.

The camino will come in it’s own time. Living this time towards my trek as it’s own camino, as a time listen to the wind, to reduce any burdens I’m carrying, to learn from living, that’s how I want to live my life. One great journey, one step, one consideration, one lesson, one day at a time.

Check in for my diary updates – Camino 2018 One Girl Project.

Do you want to hike for one girl too? Join us here on the women who hike team.

I’ve added a thank you page for the champions of this story here.

Support crews are everything. A few more opportunities for corporate sponsorship

Modest goals and one thing at a time, that’s worthy enough for me. I’m more interested in sustainable growth.

‘I have begun to think of life as a series of ripples widening out from an original center.’ ~ Seamus Heaney

I was unexpectedly yet profoundly influenced by those months we spent living in Ireland earlier last year. Once you have been so profoundly touched and changed by a life experience (or person) you can’t go back to who you were before can you? Ireland blew its way into my soul with its lyrical language and genuine peoples. A cold country warmed by the kindness and smiles of those genuine people. A wild landscape that exhales its stories. Stories that are shrouded by myth and folklore, with a history of pain and hardship but also of growth and hope.

During our time in Ireland I spend many hours trail running in the Irish country side. Meandering my way through the overgrown laneways and along the shorelines of the Irish Sea. I started collecting trash to protect the ocean’s inhabitants. In sharing my trash collecting online I was surprised by the response. I started receiving photos and comments from people around the world who had also decided to get collecting for the sea-life (for our life). I started dreaming of ways to make something bigger of this but then we were off – off to live the dream that had brought us to Ireland from Australia. Slow travelling the Mediterranean in a campervan.

‘Even if the last move did not succeed, the inner command says move again.’ ~ Seamus Heaney.

When we returned from our travels ready to settle for a while I thought I’d write a book. We’d seen and experienced so much during our trip and together with the journey to get there, I wanted to write the story. I started with a lot of energy but in hindsight I wasn’t ready. That can happen after going through something extraordinary. A new struggle ensues; how do we process it? It’s a bit like the whirlpool of sand you stir up when you walk through a river at great force. The particles need time to settle and we need time to LIVE with what we have experienced rather than force all the particles into a sediment state.

Ironically the part I got stuck at in my book was explaining Ireland and doing justice to what it meant to me and now a year later, the meaning of that time is finding its way into words.

Rather than trying to write the whirlpool of post trip reflections into a book and sticking at the blog I’d been writing for the past couple of years, (that poor blog was getting very confused with its direction in the whirlpool) I started a new single focussed chapter. I know I am better when I focus on one big challenge at a time. I’d hike the Camino to Santiago de Compostela and I’d do for One Girl Australia. I would write about that and I would create a project out of it. I’d build on what I’d learnt from sharing my waste collecting and be inspired by people like Toby of Just Grab Bits who care enough to try and change something from where they stand.

A project that I would not over extend with expectations. A modest fundraising target and each step considered and part of a sustainable foundation. A project that would be its own Camino (path, journey) towards actually walking the Camino. As the actual walk comes closer I find myself feeling nerves. Good nerves. Nerves that come from that space where the inward work is happening. The self-exploration and the discovery of what is scaring me, the things I need to face and change.

One day as I stood on the cliff’s edge in the coastal town in West Cork, Ireland where we were living – I was a wild warrior woman standing strong in my own life. As I stood windswept by the force, the solitude and the exhilaration of standing in the face of a new path, it was the time I realised my first deep truth:

‘That not standing there open and exposed on a new path would scare me more.’ 

As this project exposes my fears I am drawing on my time in Ireland to stand up to them. Gratefully and scarily my One Girl story is being shared. I have written articles that have been published. One on Travel with Merakiand one on the Travel Play Live Magazineblog. I am having to put myself out into a bigger world. A world where there will be criticisms, expectations, self- doubt, questioning my worth and ability and a world where I need to be open to what I fear the most – having to stand up to it all rather than quietly hiding or numbing the discomfort of those fears (you know the sorts of things net-flixing, trying to control stuff, chocolate eating, wine drinking, ego bolstering, procrastinating).

But then again aren’t we all scared of something? And I wonder am I scared mostly of myself – of what I think of myself. My own criticisms ‘I’m not a writer’, my own expectations ‘I can’t let people down’ and my own self-doubt ‘what’s so creative about doing a walk and fundraising alongside of it’, am I selfish ‘should I be sharing what is inherently a privileged life’, ‘I do have a lot of ideas I haven’t developed’. This is the space that requires the hardest work – the persistence, strength, trust and the standing in the face of those fears. That’s where the growth sprouts from and our spirit sours with a power we’ve earnt.

‘I always believed that whatever had to be written would somehow get itself written.’ ~ Seamus Heaney.

As this page is written and I decide that dang it – I want to write and photograph and share the beauty of life as I get lost in finding my own voice. That is truly SELF CARE to prioritise what you need, to be less scared (of yourself) and it is also completely fine to consider creating something a job, even if it is not a paid in dollars. I am prepared to make sacrifices to live this life and yes it’s not lost on me that I am privileged to be able to choose less.

Some stats of how I am rewarded by this work:

  •  I dreamed of educating 10 girls and 6 have secured an education.
  • A ‘Women Who Hike’ team organically evolved along the way and it has a member.
  • Kimmy Day has embraced her inner passion for the outdoors and One Girl and signed up for her own Camino. Buen Camino Kimmi – I’ll see you on the trail!
  • Some pretty RAD sponsors have come on board to help me give some presence to the project.
  • I am moved often daily by the kindness of the people who have supported this endeavour with words, support and one very special crystal that will join me along the way of St James next month.

What Ireland did for me was to tip me off about a well … a well that lives inside me and is deep. It’s filled with many thing: happiness, joy, pain, sadness, embarrassment, shame, gratitude, love and a belief in the magic and mystery of life. It is a well that is filled with life, my life – a life that has always been lived vulnerably and a little nomadically. It is not time to hide behind a few fears but to embrace the voice I have. A voice that needs to feel its way and will always be written as a life story. A voice that can on any given day be wobbly or sturdy – but a voice that comes from my own original centre and is learning to not afraid to speak.

Check in for my diary updates – Camino 2018 One Girl Project.

Do you want to hike for one girl too? Join us here on the women who hike team.

I’ve added a thank you page for the champions of this story here.

Support crews are everything. A few more opportunities for corporate sponsorship.

We met because somewhere along the (on)line we shared a little of ourselves through our stories.

I posted this image on my social account recently to say thank you and to acknowledge the support of this bunch of adventurously spirited women. At the time of posting together for One Girl Australia we had enough in the kitty to educate 4 girls.

UNREAL hey! And guess what I haven’t even met all of these women. Not personally, if that means face to face but what’s personally? To me is a shared connection. We’ve met because somewhere along the (on)line we shared a little of ourselves through our stories and we spoke to each other. Our lives are all different but there is a thread … we are adventurous women who explore this life journey. Some of us close to home, some far from home – who defines home anyhow? To me home is a feeling.

Each year our lives look just a little different as we strive to seek what is is important, to face the fears and the expectations that may hold us back, to question what is right, to change what needs changing, to live in the peaks and troughs and to live life like we mean it.

I love that about this community of women that I’ve had the privilege of finding solidarity with. The ones who have supported, encouraged and reminded me that I am not alone. Because of these everyday adventurers I feel like I live in a world that’s stronger, kinder, safer.

As we head towards International Women’s day let’s recognise the importance of each other. Let’s celebrate what we create, that we share, that we can connect in this wonderful world and help each other by opening ourselves, stepping out (up), speaking and growing – however that looks.

Time to throw some more heart into this project. Mi camino.

 

Do you want to hike for one girl too? Join us here on the women who hike team.

Check in for my diary updates – Camino 2018 One Girl Project.

I’ve added a thank you page for the champions of this story here.

Support crews are everything. A few more opportunities for corporate sponsorship.

Sponsors of The Camino Frances 2018 (769km) – Trek for One Girl:

     

There is a time for solitude and there is a time to let the winds blow in the spirits that we need to grow.

At the beginning of last year, we spend 3 months living in Ireland. For those of you who followed my previous blog or have been around IG for a while you will know how much I adored our time on the Emerald Isle. The essence of the country and its people still lingers in my soul. To me it had a wildness that will never be tamed, a people whose character is strong, kind and loyal and a culture that knows its values.  A culture that sings, talks and shares its history (the beautiful and the ugly) through stories and myths. A people who are  unafraid to leave some thought to the unknown.

One morning as I stood in the queue of the post office I realised that the queue never moves fast. It’s wise to not be in a hurry when posting a letter in country Ireland. Hurry had no purpose in this small country town. Of course the purpose of the queue was to form an order but more importantly is served as a way to connect community. People know each other, grandchildren are asked after, information is shared and warm “how are ye’s” were met with warm smiles and a “grand, yerself”?

I like to think of myself as a strong kind of character and I have the resilience to withstand testing conditions and forge new paths for myself and my family. I do spend a load of time alone in my own space and in nature and that fuels my thoughts and give me the solitude I need to  know if I’m comfortable with where I am in life (space to tap into how I’m feeling). I am learning about the importance of the strength that comes from a community. Do we need to be a part of every community that interests us or we situationally find ourselves in? I don’t think so. But for those of us who seek to understand and explore our way through a life filled with meaning we do need a community that ‘gets’ us, supports us, challenges us and holds us. The one that helps to propel us forward and because sometimes we want to do things differently from the crowd it can be a little scary doing that. We deep feelers can only put our hearts where we feel trust. Trust helps us grow. And when we grow we become our most courageous selves.

Like the seasons in nature our communities aren’t always static. There are those, who like the earth’s soil remain – grounding us and adjusting with us when the season changes. But it is also ok to let go if we find we not longer fit where we are, to seek new ideas, challenges and connections. To give less of ourselves to those who don’t ‘get’ us. The nature of our communities can come in many forms, sometimes it is the queue at the post office, sometimes it’s where we work, the school we drop the kids off, our families, our school friends, the people we talk to in our street and our online spaces, the conversations we have at the market, the shops, on the trail,  our language classes, the gym. I don’t think it matters where we find our people, just as long as we do.

We need our people. The ones who are open to us bringing out our best and worst thoughts, encouraging our reflection, those who live in a way that shows us that (most of us) have choices and voices, that we are lucky, those who put themselves out there in a way we never imagine we ever could. You see, those people – they are moving, they are growing, they are the ones who will water our seeds. You know the seeds I’m talking about –  those tiny possibilities that hold our deepest dreams.

Our people, our communities, our tribe they help us with the thing that holds most of us back – our fears. Because they believe in us, they are on our path for the same reason, they are not competing, they are not judging, they are forgiving and understanding. They are there to help us achieve what is possible for us. As a dreamer of many dreams I want to thank you Ireland. You beautiful wild, rugged land of ferocious winds, you taught me what I needed to learn most. There is a time for solitude and there is a time to let the winds blow in the spirits that we need to grow.

“I think it’s neat you do what you want. Not enough chicks do that, if you ask me–just tell society and their expectations to go fuck themselves. If more women did that, we’d be better off.” ~ Cheryl StrayedWild.

Check in for my diary updates – Camino 2018 One Girl Project.

I’ve added a thank you page for the champions of this story here.

Support crews are everything. A few more opportunities for corporate sponsorship.

Sponsors of The Camino Frances 2018 (769km) – Trek for One Girl:

     

Because a few of you asked how you can help. Here we are.

Time to get real!

This project of mine is all about educating girls and I know that it CAN be done. I know because not so long ago my spirited 10 year old daughter showed me how.

At the end of 2016 just prior to setting off on our adventure,  Zoë  (said daughter) and I sat in the audience of a presentation from Morgan Koegal, CEO of One Girl Australia at the Travel Play Live/She Went Wild Expo and she said,

‘when something feels wrong in your gut – do something about it’.

And that’s exactly what Zoë did. Together with a few friends in a concentrated two-week school raffle  with ethical and sustainable prizes she raised enough money for One Girl to educate 8 girls for a year.

One Girl works in both Sierra Leone and Uganda, two of the most challenging places on earth to be born a girl.

For girls born in these countries – Education changes everything.

  • A girl’s income increases by 10-25% for every extra year of education.
  • She’ll get married later and have a smaller, healthier family when she’s ready.
  • Her health, economic status, and future family all benefit.
  • Educated mothers are more than twice as likely to educate their children.

Same chance I want for Zoë.

My mum asked me last year what we were doing to make sure those girls would be educated again this year.

This mum. This is what I’m doing (side note, my mum, 72 and hikes like a mountain goat):

I’m hiking 769kms of The Camino Frances for mothers in Africa, who, like me want their girls to have a chance in life.

But I do need help … in these kinds of ways:

  1. Donate

I’m not yet actively fundraising. I’m still getting the foundations in order, but, some pretty amazing hikey type chicks have already kicked us off and we’ve already educated ONE girl (I know – AWESOME) so…

If you’re inclined, looking for an Australian tax refundable contribution or you’ve got cash burning a hole in your pocket, or know someone who does – you can donate here:

Frances Antonia – One Girl fundraiser

But that’s just one way, please read on…

2. Get your hike or challenge on – Commit

It’s beyond cool doing good stuff for yourself but try doing it for girls who need your help … ALL kinds of WONDERFUL.

You can create a fundraiser page here. Join the Women Who Hike team and get your trail shoes ON! You can hike anyway you want – set your own challenge:

  • Walk to work once a week
  • Get off the bus, train, tram a stop early
  • Do the stairs or the park at lunch-time
  • Meet a friend, do it with your kids, family, colleagues, on your own
  • Man I wish I could make a commitment to walk with my mum, that would be a lovely use of time (she lives in Aussie though, soz mum)
  • Give up coffee/wine for a week/month – for One Girl
  • Rope your workmates in
  • Or be like me – plan an epic adventure that works for you

What-evs friends – get creative! Why not? Creativity can look like all of those things and so much more.

3. Support

Not all of us have spare $ but we all have spare kindness! Say G’day, share the One Girl Story if you like the idea of what I’m doing.

Follow One Girl– be inspired by what they do.

Go for a walk tag it #hikeforonegirl. I’ll find you there and walking in the outdoors you’ll find yourself there too!

See ☝🏼 I found you! I know you care and I know you’re in the outdoors and that friends – keeps it all real.

4. Consume Consciously

 

Get your sanitary products from Tsuno – from Roz, the creator of a better humble pad and tampon. Better for us and better for our planet.

Tsuno pads are made from sustainable, natural bamboo fibre and corn starch. They are super soft, super absorbent, ultra thin and free from chlorine.

Their new range of tampons are made from 100% certified organic cotton and are chlorine and dioxin bleach free.

AND … the boxes are sooooo pretty don’t you think?

How’s this? Tsuno are so passionate about gender equality that half of their profits are donated to charities; empowering women (and girls) living in poverty.

BIG supporters of One Girl’s commitment to educating girls.

That’s WINNING on so many levels friends.

5. Gifts

Give meaningful ones. CHECK.this.out!

6. Pledge your birthday – I DARE ya! I’m doing it this year.

Birthdays. We all have them. They come around every year and with it, the inevitable question, “What do you want for your birthday?”

You CAN here: Give up your birthday and give a girl and education instead.

Phew!

That’s a start.

What do you think? What else? Any other ideas for me?

 

 

Check in for my diary updates – Camino 2018 One Girl Project.

I’ve added a thank you page for the champions of this story here.

Support crews are everything. A few more opportunities for corporate sponsorship.

Sponsors of The Camino Frances 2018 (769km) – Trek for One Girl: